How The Internet Is Destroying Your Brain

Just Being Online Makes You Really, Really Depressed

It has been theorized for basically as long as the Internet has been publicly available that being online can make you seriously, clinically depressed. It’s not an assertion made without evidence, as numerous surveys of infrequent-to-addicted internet users show a positive correlation between their number of web surfing hours logged and their subsequent feelings of sadness, isolation, and alienation. Some critics postulate that heavy use of the internet more than doubles a person’s chance of being depressed; others say that the internet might not be depression’s trigger so much as it is its refuge.

Online Socializing Makes You Insular

When communicating in person, the entire interaction is punctuated with non-verbal cues that can totally supercede the meaning of the words within it. Absent the conversation partner right in front of you to indicate his or her sarcasm or sincerity, you have only your own filters through which to interpret the language. It should come as no surprise that your internal filters are surprisingly dependent on your present mood; thus a semantically ambiguous phrase like “no thanks” sent after a particularly rough commute home is much more easily-absorbed as a sardonic dismissal instead of – and perhaps how it was intende – a mere polite refusal.

If the opposite happens, and you are endowed with a ton of friends on Facebook or some other social media site, other studies have demonstrated that your stress levels are likely through the roof. The higher your friend count, they say, the more likely you are to be consumed with publishing bite-sized and socially acceptable aspects of your personality to the online public, which only exacerbates issues with your real-life relationships. The end result: the stress of maintaining online friends prevents you from making – and maintaining – any more real ones.

The Internet, with the aid of computer hotkeys, has given its users the incredibly easy ability to jump between tasks, subjects and ideas within a matter of seconds. Because there’s no wait, we make these jumps frequently – really frequently – about every two minutes. Except we never actually utilize the “multi” part – or even the “task” part of the Internet’s supposed gift. Instead, we get caught in the ceaseless mental doldrums between interrupting and restarting. And so, given that clear memories of single events are unattainable on the Internet, the brain attempts to compensate for that with blurry, multiple-exposure memories of everything that happened.

Multi-tasking in this sense can reduce one’s ability to pay attention at all, and in turn reduces our ability to think critically and problem solve. Studies have shown that after a while, your ability to recall memories starts to deteriorate, along with your IQ. The more one multi-tasks, the greater the cognitive damage becomes and the harder it is for you to recover. And if these habits begin in childhood, the risk of developing an attention deficiency disorder spikes, as well as many other behavior problems down the line.

In 2050 A.D. Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in the Purgatory waiting room, when God enters...

"Well, Bill," says God, "I'm confused. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell: you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet you've also created some of the most unearthly frustrations known to mankind. I'm going to do something I've never done before: I'm going to let you choose where you want to go."

Bill replies, "Well, thanks, God. What's the difference between the two?"

God says, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly to help you make your decision."

"Okay, where should I go first?" asks Bill.

God says, "That's up to you."

Bill says, "OK, let's try Hell first."

So Bill goes to Hell. It's a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters. There are thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun is shining, the temperature is just right. The whole thing looks perfect, and Bill is very pleased.

"This is great!" he tells God, "If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!"

"Fine," says God, and off they go.

Heaven is a high place in the clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It very nice but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thinks for a moment and announces his decision.

"Hmm, I think I prefer Hell." he tells God.

"Fine," says God, "As you desire."

So Bill Gates is taken to Hell.

Two weeks later, God decides to check up on Bill to see how he's doing in Hell. When God arrives in Hell, he finds Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He's being burned and tortured by demons.

"How's everything going, Bill?" God asks.

Bill replies, his voice full of anguish and disappointment, "This is awful, it's not what I expected at all, I can't believe it. What happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?"

God smiles and says, "That was the screen saver."